Why do leaders find it so difficult to talk about inclusion?

Decades of legislation, policy, exhortation and moral argument hasn’t shifted the dial on inclusion far enough or quickly enough. The paradigm of the White, middle-class, male and charismatic leader remains central to the blueprint of many organisations and continues to shape an expectation of toughness, dynamism, focus and ruthlessness in those who are thought to exhibit ‘leadership qualities’.

In a post-pandemic world that faces such an upsurge of mental health challenges and with so many talented people questioning whether they even want to be part of the modern corporate environment, we need to change that conversation. Quickly.

Our experience with research data and dialogue within organisations shows us that allyship is perhaps the only way we can make rapid progress on many aspects of inclusion. Our existing leadership cohort must be helped to recognise the need to create an inclusive society, want the benefits it will bring, and become allies of all those who are excluded, disadvantaged or marginalised by current business and organisational models.

After a global pandemic that has made us all aware of our shared humanity, perhaps we now have that chance?

Achieving this will require two major actions from our current and aspiring leaders: we need them to show courage and to exhibit curiosity if we are to develop a more inclusive style of leadership.

Here’s why

For many current managers and leaders, any conversation about inclusion can seem fraught with danger. We’ve found that the predominant male and White cohort are often afraid to even discuss many of the issues for fear of being attacked, feeling unwelcome or treated as dinosaurs who need to be overthrown. As a result, some have pulled up the drawbridge, while others are simply uncertain how best to make a difference. In addition, the current paradigm has served many of them very well and enables them to continue their upward career trajectory. Who needs to rock that boat?

This is where courage comes in

The word ‘courage’ comes from the Old French, meaning ‘heart and spirit’. The conversation of inclusion is one that should indeed be driven by the heart, as it invites us to explore our common humanity. It asks us to consider the ways in which we are united in what makes us human – our thoughts, our emotions, our fears, our hopes, and our dreams.

Psychology shows us that human beings need three things to be motivated. They need to feel competent in what they do, autonomous in the choices they make and connected to others along the way. It is this desire for connection that we need to highlight, and the way to do this is to bridge the gaps of misunderstanding, mistrust, and disconnection.

The only way this can happen is through dialogue, so leaders need to create the safe space in which this can take place. Psychologists would describe this as ‘psychological safety’ – where everyone can show up as they are and speak up without any fear of embarrassment, shame, or humiliation. Within any psychologically safe space, the full range of human emotions are welcome.

Psychology also tells us that whatever we repress will grow stronger inside of us and control us, so a good leader knows that inviting people to express what they are really feeling is key to creating positive change. In order that people feel safe to do this, a leader must acknowledge and validate what others share.

This kind of sharing can feel daunting to start with, but is simply a habit that we can create. As the expression goes, “neurons that fire together wire together”, so every time we think something, say something, or do something, it will become faster, easier, and more automatic through repetition, as we are strengthening those connections in our brain.

Being courageous is something that improves with practice.

As a leader, are you ready to show up with the courage to help your people meet their fundamental human need for belonging?

Find the courage to:

• open up that inclusive conversation; accept and recognise the responsibilities you have to be an ally and to open the door to others.
• ask difficult questions and really listen to the answers.
• refuse to defend the status quo or your deeply held convictions and even prejudices – in order to consider alternatives and new realities.
• challenge existing norms in order to innovate, change and break through to a better tomorrow.
• face the issues for real, rather than hide behind policy, procedure and box-ticking; be the one to influence and persuade others to come on the journey – to truly be an enabler of a more inclusive culture.